Psychotic Pets
I haven't posted in a while. Probably because I don't have anything too worthwhile to post about. I still don't have anything worthwhile to post about, but whatever. So I'll share some of the possessed pet stories I have.
Story #1 - The Pitbull Bird (The Pitbird??)
Ok, my sister got this lovebird for free, with a brand new cage. Why? Because this bird is psychotic and even offering it for free was way to high an assumption on the bird's worth. He came with the name Led Zeppelin - apparently he liked that music. I told you, this bird's got psychological problems. Anna has thoughtfully renamed him Kiwi. We thought the bird was cute, you know, he could talk, and loved to scamper around. Normal bird things. Until he got out. Pretty much he ran across the floor to bite my mom's toes, then flew up and started biting Anna's neck. Like draw-blood sort of bite. You can't stick you're hand in his cage for any reason - we handle him with double-lined fleece mittens. He nearly maimed the other bird in his cage - my dad had to go at him with a shoe to get him off the victim - no lie. Hopefully I'll be vacuuming the next time he gets loose.
Story #2
So my mom's over at one of her friends' house. (This was a few years back). They have a cat. End of story. No wait, there's more. So she's visiting, and this cat walks in and sits down. It then stares at my mom. For a long time this goes on, till my mom makes eye contact with the cat. Then the cat leaps off the floor and wraps itself around her neck, and goes in for the jugular. My mom and her friend finally peel that cat off, but can you imagine explaining that one at a funeral?? Honestly. Newspaper headline: "Mentally deranged cat kills random lady in a fit of rage."
Why do we as a society even own pets? Is it worth the risk? Are you willing to die for the sake of your pet? And we thought the Humane Society had no alterior motives. Ha.
So people, that's my post. Prettty pathetic, I know, but hopefully by bringing this issue of pet insanity to the awareness of others I can save innocent lives. No serious, obviously I was bored and had nothing better to write. Hope you're all have a spiffydoodledingdong day, and I'll see y'all later.
Story #1 - The Pitbull Bird (The Pitbird??)
Ok, my sister got this lovebird for free, with a brand new cage. Why? Because this bird is psychotic and even offering it for free was way to high an assumption on the bird's worth. He came with the name Led Zeppelin - apparently he liked that music. I told you, this bird's got psychological problems. Anna has thoughtfully renamed him Kiwi. We thought the bird was cute, you know, he could talk, and loved to scamper around. Normal bird things. Until he got out. Pretty much he ran across the floor to bite my mom's toes, then flew up and started biting Anna's neck. Like draw-blood sort of bite. You can't stick you're hand in his cage for any reason - we handle him with double-lined fleece mittens. He nearly maimed the other bird in his cage - my dad had to go at him with a shoe to get him off the victim - no lie. Hopefully I'll be vacuuming the next time he gets loose.
Story #2
So my mom's over at one of her friends' house. (This was a few years back). They have a cat. End of story. No wait, there's more. So she's visiting, and this cat walks in and sits down. It then stares at my mom. For a long time this goes on, till my mom makes eye contact with the cat. Then the cat leaps off the floor and wraps itself around her neck, and goes in for the jugular. My mom and her friend finally peel that cat off, but can you imagine explaining that one at a funeral?? Honestly. Newspaper headline: "Mentally deranged cat kills random lady in a fit of rage."
Why do we as a society even own pets? Is it worth the risk? Are you willing to die for the sake of your pet? And we thought the Humane Society had no alterior motives. Ha.
So people, that's my post. Prettty pathetic, I know, but hopefully by bringing this issue of pet insanity to the awareness of others I can save innocent lives. No serious, obviously I was bored and had nothing better to write. Hope you're all have a spiffydoodledingdong day, and I'll see y'all later.
posted by Anonymous at 3:33 PM
7 Comments:
I have a suicidal fish you know! No lie! Once I put Peaty into a small container while I washed his tank and I came back into my room and he was gone! After 4 minutes of searching I found him way under my dresser covered in dust and hair. He wasn't moving so I put him in the water to clean off the dust, then all of a sudden he starting swimming around. I was like "whoa! pork and beans my fish is physco!"
So that's my story. (yeah this fish is like 5 years old by the way, and has a tank mate - Howie Rupert Julio 3rd - since the Car Rally.)
Anyways, good story Caroline!
wow. I seriously started laughing and couldn't stop!
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
wow, those were some funny stories guys. i liked the one about the bird who was blessed with the gift of flight, and the fish andrea. was he in a shot glass with a pebble for scenery? (just like the ocean!!)
actually I sour cream container :D (only when cleaning the tank of course) Right now he's in a sweet tank with a fake hollow holy rock, fake plants and wonderful art all over his tank (thanks to Window Markers) hehehe
Those are some good stories. And my day was very spiffydoodledingdong-like :)
that's a very ubber word if you ask me....
Post a Comment
<< Home