Postmen Are Mean on Saturdays

So, one day, this truck backs up to our curb, and two guys get out plunk this huge mailbox on OUR YARD. So at first I think this is good---I can mail letters in my backyard!! But then I realize it isn't the kind of mailbox you put letters in---it's a letter holding box thing!! So it's completely useless to the law-abiding citizen. The whole family was in distress. I've gotten over it now (therapy does wonders), but if you're ever passing by our house, and have an urgent need for a useless mailbox thing, I'm sure we can come to a reasonable agreement. As it stands, I think I'm developing frostbite here in our basement. Wait, OH NO! it's PLUCKED CHICKEN SYNDROME!!!!!! I need to find warmth!! Anybody wanna go to Hawaii?